Wednesday, 13 June 2012

My dog Cooper vs The Olympic Torch.

You should see him now!

If you are sick of all the Olympic Torch chat. Have a read of this. It might just make you smile. A prime example of how man’s best friend can really mess up your plans!

In 2010 we had the Pope drive past the ACE Property Management office in his wee car. Brunstfield Place was packed and our office was mobbed. Fast forward to today and we were expecting the street and our office to be exactly the same with “that bloody torch” passing through. By all accounts it was as we expected. A great occasion not to be missed. Guess what, I missed it!

I had it all planned. Picture of the torch with the office behind, branded car parked out front and the streets packed with people. I could see the picture framed on the office wall. 

The parade was going past between 18:40 and 19:00. I had a viewing on Falcon Avenue (beside Waitrose in Morningside) at 17:30 and then Cooper, my mischievious 7-month old, blonde Golden Retriever needed a walk. Viewers turned up bang on time. I was out of the viewing by 17:40, with good feedback! I high tailed it to Blackford pond where Coops and I have been a million times before without incident. The plan was a quick walk up to the meadow, with Coop’s taking care of business, back to the car no fuss, as usual, and then straight back to the office where I would be in place, camera at the ready by 18:15. 

Oh no....Cooper had other ideas! We walked up the path, with the pond on our right and the hill on our left and we made it to the meadow where I chatted to a fellow dog walker. Coop’s was having a great time dominating some wee hamster looking dog. We rounded the big tree met a few other dogs and things were going great. “Right Coop’s, lets go!” I headed back down the hill and towards the gap in the wall where you get back onto the path. Coop’s flies past me on a mission and disappears behind some very tall grass. Next, I hear the sound of water splashing.  That is not the sound I wanted hear! I called for him. He darts out into the open caked in mud up to his knees. He comes right to me all pleased with himself then bolts back in. I yell at him and he comes back even dirtier. I grabbed him, got him on the lead and ran with him through the long grass to try and clean him off a little. The clock is really ticking now!  Some arse that watched it happen shouts “haha, at least your dogs not white mate!” I shout back “nice one” and caried on running.  

As you can imagine, when Cooper gets wet he can take a while to dry. When he gets muddy it’s a time consuming mission to get him clean, many an hour has been lost in the bathroom trying to keep Cooper in the bath.  I’m now facing a soaking wet muddy dog in the car, excellent! Worse things have happened so we get going. Little did I know Cooper was about to take things to a whole new level!

We head back down the path towards the car, Coop’s is once again a free spirit and off the lead. We are ok for time, almost 18:00.  Coop’s stops for a pee, he is currently trying to master the 3-legged stance, so I head on.  I turn around to find Cooper is standing on the wall of the pond, he has spied the ducks! The wall is the height of my waist “Get off!” “DOWN!”. Too late he’s in! Cooper has launched himself into the pond and swam to the centre chasing an unsurprisingly uncatchable group of ducks. When he realises it’s a hopeless case he turns back and climbs onto the bank.  I cannot believe it. 

Tick tock tick tock, I now know that the beginning of the procession have reached Bruntsfield, the torch is on its way. I try to get him back but he is far too interested in the ducks. It seems there is no other option, I have got to go in! I jump the wall and land in soft marsh. He proceeds to leg it along the bank just out of my reach. He eventually comes back to me and I get him on the lead. He’s soaking and absolutely stinking. Then two things happen;

1)      I realise that this side of the wall is my shoulder height and the only way out is back over it.
2)      I’m sinking into the mud in my work gear. Brilliant! 

Cooper weighs in at around 40kgs (he’s a big boy #prouddad) and he ain’t no high jumper. I grab him and after three attempts I get him back over the wall. I am now soaking but Cooper, all smiles, has had the time of his life! I scramble back over, run to the car get Coop’s in the boot and assess the damage. Conclusion: drenched, wet feet, and mud everywhere...Coop’s is not in great nick either. Bang Tidy! Oh, and its 18:30.

I motor back to Bruntsfield to find police and people lining the streets in the hundreds. There is no chance I’m getting near the office.  I ditched the car at Gillespie Terrace and met the parade coming down Bruntsfield Place, heading for Tollcross. 

My plan had come tumbling down... there would be no framed photo for the ACE Office wall.

However, the viewers want a second viewing and Cooper learnt that ducks cannot be caught, two out of three is not bad I guess! Bloody dogs!

"You ain't getting me out of here dad!"

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